…Do people not honestly know how welfare works or what it takes for someone to get to the point of asking for it?
When none of the dozens of jobs will call you back for an interview, and it’s been two months since your last job, and you have a $800 rent to make, as well as utilities that add up to $300, no food in your house to eat except some ramen and condiments? And what if you have kids to take care of in all of that?
What is the proper response to that? Obviously it’s not to call people lazy or a slew of racial slurs. It’s not to blame one guy in the White House who inherited all this financial crisis and has no money in reserves to fix it in a day, much less a few years.
Congratulations if you’ve been one of the lucky few
spoiled brats young adults to have come from a wealthy, or well-to-do, family. Congratulations if you’ve never had to taste the +$40,000 debt paying off student loans for a college education that now means diddly-squat in this economy. Congratulations if you’ve never had a spouse who divorced you and refused to pay child support for your two kids while you work two-three low-income jobs just to keep them from starving. Congratulations if the mortgage company never repossessed your house because you can’t make the $1000 a month payment because your boss never increased wages to reflect the recession. Congratulations if you’ve never had to file for bankruptcy because you simply don’t have the money to pay anyone back, much less feed yourself. Congratulations if your boss never out-sourced your manufacturing job to some foreign country and you don’t have the job experience to get a new one because all you’ve been doing for 20 years is assembly line work.
To be honest: welfare may be the only saving grace in any of those given situations. For the millions of Americans who legitimately need that support net to get by, don’t harass them or belittle them or dehumanize them. You have to have it rough before you go asking for welfare. Heck, you have to have it rough just to get welfare.
That is what welfare is all about.
Not perpetuating a “dead-beat” stereotype.
But proving that people and nations are capable of helping others in need and behaving like a community that cares.
…. What is this garbage. How do people get away with writing crap like this? Cannot compute. Cannot. Compute.
“She is found by primitive Ethiopian tribesmen who see in her beautiful golden hair and flawless white skin, the chance for great profits for their poor village”
For further info, this is the description of a book called IN DARKEST AFRICA by one J.J. Argus.
What is even this.
Like…I just can’t.
Africa as a monolith? Check.
Helpless White girl? Check.
Sexualized PoC in a position of power over said White girl? Check.
Reversion of traditional slave/master roles? Check.
Do you guys even try for originality or common sense anymore?
Sounds like the same shit people were writing in the Antebellum era: “The travesty of the helpless and innocent white woman being ravaged by savage barbarians/Native Americans/Coloured Folk!”
I have lost all faith in humanity.
Jessica is my fatspiration.
I wore this bikini to the lake today.
Majestic has been working and going to school full time so we don’t get as much QT as we used to and when we’re spread thin (ha), we regenerate in nature.
The thing is, Mercury’s in Retrograde, I’m shedding my uterine lining and my idea of “going into nature” doesn’t ever involve (or rather, I’d prefer if it didn’t) thin white insecure teenaged girls.
But today it did.
Normally, I’d do what I do best. Sitting in unflattering positions, eating passionately and aggressively and deflecting everyone’s poor self image are my strong suits.(right next to fucking, tying a pretty bow and swearing) I like to incite and I love to be seen in my fat bawdy. It reminds me I’m alive….surviving and thriving.
but like I said before, Mercury’s in Retrograde, I haven’t gotten intentional time with my Lover and I’m on my motherfucking period.
Today was not the goddamn day.
Watching a couple different flocks of thin teenage girls whisper to each other and then stare at two magical creatures such as myself and my beautiful wife with a look like they’d smelled a ripe fart filled me with a fiery rage.
Fat people can’t just fucking go to the lake and move their bodies in public without repercussions. The majority of thin people CAN.
Now, because this is not my first rodeo and I do not want anyone to get it twisted, I want everyone to read my words carefully and I really want thin folks to GET REAL with themselves right now.
I know the thin folks who read my blog make some serious attempts at becoming more body positive and I know you all try to think more critically about the ways in which you participate in a culture that is out to kill me. I know a lot of thin folks in my real life care about me, love me and even find my devilishly good looks to be quite captivating.
So when I talk about my feelings and real experiences, I do not want to hear about how you’re not the bad guy and how you don’t appreciate my anger. I don’t care
Today I took the countless stares, whispers and upset faces personally. Instead of challenging them, I started to shake with unadulterated rage and huffed off. I moved our blanket and snacks to a secluded inlet of the lake and sulked.
When Majestic and I started to process my feelings, I told them the reason I feel unsafe around thin folks at the beach was about me 1. seeing their fucking faces when they look at me and 2. remembering what it was like to hate my body and the gross awful things I thought about people then. Worse, the things I was encouraged by my peers to say and think about people and the way we bonded over mean and hurtful feelings like it would keep us satisfied until we allowed ourselves a small portioned diet meal.
I told Majestic that thin people are thinking a few different things about my body and I don’t like any of them. Are they disgusted beyond belief? Are they sad for me and my pitiful fat existence? Are they just staring because my body has become so abject and such a spectacle that they’re just interested in knowing what it looks like that unclothed? Are they scared about what my body makes them think about their bodies?
Majestic said, “They’re uncomfortable. They want you to be invisible, but you refuse. It would be easier for them if you hid, but you won’t and that’s upsetting.”
So maybe some of them are thinking about how ~*brave*~ I must be and that’s supposed to quell my upset over all the other thoughts they could be thinking.
As if them thinking its brave to have such a revolting body and still put on bathing suit and enjoy a swim just like them is a comforting thought.
But it is brave to know your body is scary and that people want to destroy it, but that it’s yours and you love it and you made the radical decision not to deny yourself a dip in a lake on a hot day or an ice cream cone or a lover who respects you.
Because I know it’s hard to be a teenage girl and if I thought they’d listen, I’d sit down with every last one of them and tell them I remember what it was like to be them and that I know what it’s like to carry that venom inside you.
Because as much as I want to tell the world how they hurt themselves by hating me, I really just want to fucking float around in the cool water like everyone else but you don’t want that for me
And tomorrow’s just another day for me to be fat in your face and if that’s hard for you, TOO FUCKING BAD
Love this. That’s all I can say.
It used to be called illegitimacy. Now it is the new normal. After steadily rising for five decades, the share of children born to unmarried women has crossed a threshold: more than half of births to American women under 30 occur outside marriage.
Once largely limited to poor women and minorities, motherhood without marriage has settled deeply into middle America. The fastest growth in the last two decades has occurred among white women in their 20s who have some college education but no four-year degree, according to Child Trends, a Washington research group that analyzed government data.
Among mothers of all ages, a majority — 59 percent in 2009 — are married when they have children. But the surge of births outside marriage among younger women — nearly two-thirds of children in the United States are born to mothers under 30 — is both a symbol of the transforming family and a hint of coming generational change.
One group still largely resists the trend: college graduates, who overwhelmingly marry before having children. That is turning family structure into a new class divide, with the economic and social rewards of marriage increasingly reserved for people with the most education.
“Marriage has become a luxury good,” said Frank Furstenberg, a sociologist at the University of Pennsylvania.
The shift is affecting children’s lives. Researchers have consistently found that children born outside marriage face elevated risks of falling into poverty, failing in school or suffering emotional and behavioral problems.
The forces rearranging the family are as diverse as globalization and the pill. Liberal analysts argue that shrinking paychecks have thinned the ranks of marriageable men, while conservatives often say that the sexual revolution reduced the incentive to wed and that safety net programs discourage marriage.
Large racial differences remain: 73 percent of black children are born outside marriage, compared with 53 percent of Latinos and 29 percent of whites. And educational differences are growing. About 92 percent of college-educated women are married when they give birth, compared with 62 percent of women with some post-secondary schooling and 43 percent of women with a high school diploma or less, according to Child Trends.
Almost all of the rise in nonmarital births has occurred among couples living together. While in some countries such relationships endure at rates that resemble marriages, in the United States they are more than twice as likely to dissolve than marriages. In a summary of research, Pamela Smock and Fiona Rose Greenland, both of the University of Michigan, reported that two-thirds of couples living together split up by the time their child turned 10.
Other [women] noted that if they married, their official household income would rise, which could cost them government benefits like food stamps and child care. W. Bradford Wilcox, a sociologist at the University of Virginia, said other government policies, like no-fault divorce, signaled that “marriage is not as fundamental to society” as it once was.
Even as many Americans withdraw from marriage, researchers say, they expect more from it: emotional fulfillment as opposed merely to practical support. “Family life is no longer about playing the social role of father or husband or wife, it’s more about individual satisfaction and self-development,” said Andrew Cherlin, a sociologist at Johns Hopkins University.
Money helps explain why well-educated Americans still marry at high rates: they can offer each other more financial support, and hire others to do chores that prompt conflict. But some researchers argue that educated men have also been quicker than their blue-collar peers to give women equal authority. “They are more willing to play the partner role,” said Sara McLanahan, a Princeton sociologist.
Reviewing the academic literature, Susan L. Brown of Bowling Green State University recently found that children born to married couples, on average, “experience better education, social, cognitive and behavioral outcomes.”
*Click above to read the full article
This is one of those, “Well, duh!” articles, but it’s still helpful to see some statistics about it. Doesn’t really answer why children are being born out of wedlock however. Just that they are.
There are quite a few men out there that don’t want to assume responsibility of a child, most of them from recent generations. But then again, there are a few women who feel like they don’t need/want the father around either. What the article has to say on children could never be more truthful: yeah, it fucking hurts the kid more than it does the parent (this is coming from experience).
And not marrying because you still want food stamps? That’s just… wow. I’m not religious, but I do believe there is a sanctity in marriage that is clearly being ignored for the sake of selfishness.